Category: Uncategorized


The Top 10 Best Time Travel Films

Continuing with the time travel theme that began with my MIDNIGHT IN PARIS review, I present to you the top 10 best time travel movies (in order):

1. Back to the Future (1985)

The “no shit” pick

2. Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)

Better than the first one? Yes, better than the first one because James Cameron had the money to fully realize the vision he wished he could convey in the first one.

3. Primer (2004)

This film will give you a headache. It will frustrate you. However, if you are patient with it and chart out everything that is being said, you will understand the story and absolutely love it. This is the most “realistic” time travel movie you will ever see.

4. Groundhog Day (1992)

One of Bill Murray’s finest and a wonderfully original story.

5. It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)

You have to be heartless to not love this movie.

6. Time Bandits (1981)

I still regard this as Terry Gilliam’s finest film.

7. Somewhere in Time (1980)

They just don’t make films like this anymore.

8. The Terminator (1984)

Arnold turned into an icon with this film.

9. Peggy Sue Got Married (1986)

Can you believe Francis Ford Coppola directed this? Nicholas Cage at one of his strangest and most hilarious.

10. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986)

Trekkies hate this one and make fun of it for its eco-message about whales. Whatever. It remains one of the best Trek films with the original crew and, even better, its set in San Francisco.

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September actually doesn’t look too bad, with Clint Eastwood returning to acting (TROUBLE WITH THE CURVE) and a social political drama about the failings of our public school system (WON’T BACK DOWN), but there are two obvious standouts that I’m very much looking forward to seeing:

Most Worthy of Your Bucks:

The Master (Weinstein Company) – Release Date: September 14 (limited release)

I have been waiting for this movie for a very long time. For one, its directed by one of Hollywood’s most talented filmmakers, Paul Thomas Anderson. It has a cast to die for with Philip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquin Phoenix (finally deciding to stop torching his career down to ashes with his “performance art”/craziness). However, most importantly, despite what the filmmaker and studio will tell you, this movie is about the Church of Scientology, which holds a deep fascination for me. I have been waiting for someone with the balls to make a feature film about this cult and it appears that someone has finally done so. There are a number of trailers already up online and I urge you to check them out.

Looper (Tristar Pictures) – Release Date: September 28

If this film doesn’t suck, this year may very well end up being the year of Joseph Gordon-Levitt. This film is director Rian Johnson’s follow-up to his fantastic two previous films, BRICK and THE BROTHERS BLOOM. Its sci-fi that involves time travel and that’s really all I need to know to make me want to see this movie. The movie also stars Bruce Willis, which is actually a turn off because I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say that its about time for Mr. Willis to stop making 30 movies a year.

Not Worthy of Your Bucks:

Resident Evil: Retribution (Screen Gems) – Release Date: September 14

There are clearly people out there who go and shell out money for this garbage or else they wouldn’t be making the 2,000th sequel to this long worn-out franchise. Did I say worn out? I meant a franchise that was never any good to begin with. For one very brief moment, Milla Jovovich actually showed some promise after THE FIFTH ELEMENT and THE MESSENGER: THE STORY OF JOAN OF ARC. Then she made RESIDENT EVIL and married Paul W.S. Anderson, a “director” only in the sense that the opening credits of his movies list him as one. Anderson doesn’t have the talent to even competently show a character walk from one end of the frame to another, let alone know how to craft a decent story. People who pay to watch this dreck are simple minded and you shouldn’t be simple minded either by seeing this.

House at the End of the Street (Relativity Media) – Release Date: September 21

I don’t blame filmmakers who agree to direct these movies. They’re typically made by commercial directors who are looking for their chance to direct a feature film. Even they understand that what they’re making is crap. I blame the studios for green lighting these films. Strictly making money should not be the primary consideration of a movie studio. Some focus should be placed on producing quality product as well and there is none of that going on when something like this movie is being released to the public.

I should have done this last week, but I didn’t come up with the idea of doing a monthly See/Don’t See feature until today. With the Summer 2012 films in full gear, there are a lot of choices for adults, kids, and everyone in between. I won’t run down the list of everything coming out each month, but instead I will give you one film I am most wanting to see and one I am most unwilling to see with runners-up for both categories.  Mind you, I have not seen these films so my picks are entirely based on what I predict will suck and not suck. So here goes:

Most Worth Buying a Ticket to See

Prometheus (20th Century Fox) – Release Date: June 8

Ridley Scott returning to his sci-fi roots is enough to make me run to the theater. Add the fact that its set in the world of ALIEN is just added sugar. Am I expecting perfection? No, but I am expecting to be fully entertained and come away in awe.

Runner-Up: Brave (Pixar/Disney) – Release Date:  June 22

Pixar’s first foray in the fairy tale world and this one looks like the studio has wiped itself clean from last year’s stench that was CARS 2. The trailers do remind me very much of HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON, but considering how much I loved that film, similarities between the two is not a bad thing.

Not Worth Your Time

Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Witness Protection (Lionsgate) – Release Date: June 29

Do I really have to explain why you should avoid this film? If you are seriously considering this movie, then please, by all means, do not read my blog.

Runner-Up: That’s My Boy (Columbia/Sony) – Release Date: June 15

To think that Adam Sandler used to be funny at one time. I used to actually look forward to the next Adam Sandler film! Those days are long gone and Sandler has turned into a corporate money-making machine who spends half a brain cell to churn out mindless light humor once or twice a year.

The 10 Worst Films of 2011

In no ranking order are my top 10 worst films of 2011 (and there were a lot):

1. Battle: Los Angeles (Columbia)

2. 30 Minutes or Less (Columbia)

3. Larry Crowne (the worst film of the year) (Universal)

4. Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides (Disney)

5. Your Highness (Universal)

6. Suckerpunch (Warner Bros)

7. The Mechanic (CBS Films/Millenium Films)

8. Unknown (Warner Bros)

9. Drive Angry (Summit Entertainment)

10. The Hangover Part II (Warner Bros)

In order from best to worst are my top 10 best films of 2011

1. Moneyball (Columbia)

2. Win Win (Fox Searchlight)

3. Warrior (Lionsgate)

4. The Muppets (Disney)

5. Drive (Film District)

6. Bill Cunningham New York (Zeitgeist Films)

7. The Tree of Life (Fox Searchlight)

8. Rise of the Planet of the Apes (20th Century Fox)

9. If a Tree Falls: A Story of the Earth Liberation Front

10. I Saw the Devil

Almost a year ago, in September 2011, I determined that my new job would prevent me from regularly maintaining CineWhore and so it was time to lay this blog to rest. A few months later, missing my movie blogging, I launched Cinemafesto, which although it had a cooler name and logo design, no one was visiting it. And yet, everyone was still visiting CineWhore despite me telling you all that it was gone for good. So I have done what I should have done a long time ago….go back to CineWhore and continue it. I will begin by transferring my reviews from Cinemafesto over to here before launching into new reviews. However, I think I will do things a little differently than what I did last time. Instead of just giving you guys new movie reviews, I will try to provide you with my thoughts on the state of the movie industry, box office predictions, and the reviews will encompass not just new releases, but also old films (which I used to do when I first began CineWhore). Anyway, I’m glad that many people have still stuck to the blog despite my absence and hopefully I can continue to provide you with the same level of infotainment as before.